While you were stuck to your couch, desperately trying to finish House of Cards, baseball games on the TV be damned, turns out that baseball things did happen.
A few of the things you may have missed:
Will Middlebrooks hit three home runs in a single game. Considering that I ate three brownies at an event Friday night and felt terribly sick, his feat should be looked at as much, much harder than that.
RA Dickey struggles again. Have no fear, the Canuckler is just having those standard first act struggles that make the rising action in the second act so much more rewarding.
Baseball teams as ranked by Scrabble. It’s nearly as good as ranking them based on expected performance.
Keith Hernandez doesn’t plan on re-growing the mustache. He’s now my enemy.
John Sterling’s home run call for Kevin Youkilis is more terrible than you could ever imagine. “A Nuke from Youk! He is Kevin sent.” I just wonder how long he sat there, pondering that during spring training.
Yankees old box office number is now a phone sex hotline. Might be an improvement.
The Giants, by virtue of winning the World Series, got to wear gold this weekend. Honest to god GOLD. We live in a special time.
Vlad Guerrero and Dontrelle Willis will be coming to everyone’s favorite independent minor league The Atlantic League. (At least, if by everyone you mean me.) It is now of the utmost importance that I return to my ancestral home and watch this happen.
In one of the best pieces of sportswriting you’ll probably find this year, A Brother’s Passage on Max Scherzer and his now deceased brother.
Is your team’s owner an A-hole? Probably. But that’s the answer I would give for most people in general, too.
My favorite feature during the baseball season.
On a related note: I would be happy if Kevin Youkilis never hit another home run in a Yankee uniform - even knowing it will hurt my team.