It’s not just Hollywood building a team of heroes for Summer of 2012 with The Avengers. The Marlins are attempting the same thing. So because there are less than six weeks until Spring Training let’s have some fun. Ladies and Gentlemen, your 2012 Miami Avengers:
Josh Johnson as Captain America- The veteran with the most respect on the team. So good at his job that he would succeed in spite of the rest of the team. “Cap” was once frozen in ice. Johnson ices his arm after a start. So obvious.
Mark Buehrle as Dr. David Banner - Mild-mannered and intelligent. There when you need him, Buehrle averages 15 wins a year and has won 3 straight Gold Gloves. Good addition. But no one buys the comic for Dr. Banner.
Carlos Zambrano as The Incredible Hulk- Strong, temperamental, and erratic. The 174 Ks per season and 200+ innings may outweigh the incredible amount of damage done. Also a winner of three Silver Sluggers - “Hulk smash!”
Hanley Ramirez as Thor - With a lifetime average of .306, 25 HRs, 83 RBI, and .886 OPS Ramirez brings the hammer. (See what I did there?) Sure he had an off-year in 2011, but Thor wasn’t that great either. Plus be honest if Thor was playing short and was asked to move to third he’d complain too.
Jose Reyes as Hawkeye - OK this one is weak but like Hawkeye Reyes “…has no superhuman powers [but] he is at the very peak of human conditioning.” Averaging 57 SBs a year and reigning NL batting champ, Reyes would be a better fit with Quicksilver but he’s not in the movie. Deal with it.
Jeffrey Loria Miami residents as Tony Stark - Stark bankrolls the Avengers and donates their headquarters. To reduce cast just use Marlins fans. There are only five.
Logan Morrison as Iron Man - Simply because they are the funniest men on their respective teams. Unfortunately for LoMo he is not indispensable.
Ozzie Guillen as Nick Fury - Guillen, like Fury, built the team with someone else’s money but is responsible for keeping the all in check. Plus Guillen would look awesome with an eye patch.
With any blockbuster the sure sign of success is not how many come to the opening weekend, but how many come back?
(Image copyright of Marvel Comics and courtesy of bisforblog.net)
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